I've been generous on many occasions at the detriment of myself. You see, I’m the type of person who will “stupidly” lend/give money to someone to pay their mortgage or rent and subsequently be late with my own. And then….I sit and stew in feelings of resentment and anger because my gesture wasn't met with the level of gratitude that I had hoped for. This is wrong on all levels. Giving should be an act of selflessness that has nothing attached to it. When you give, the first thing you should do is let it go. Don’t worry about what the person receiving is going to do with the gift or the gesture. It’s out of your hands. This is a lesson I've learned and yet I continue to practice telling myself. It’s not as easy as typing it out and putting into my blog.
We are all flawed in one way or another and many times those flaws can be masked by generosity. When I think about how and what I give of myself I know that many times as much as I tell myself its about looking out and helping others the truth is, it’s about making myself feel better. I have a nagging need to be liked and appreciated but not on a grand scale. Understated yet known is how I would describe the need. It’s weird because as I type this, I think about things I've done for others and I question why? Many times, it wasn’t a situation where something was requested of me. On the contrary, it typically was my need to let the person know I’m here for you so when I need you, remember this moment and be there for me. Crazy. Writing this out is like many leaves falling in my path. Knowledge is never ending and aha moments can come fast and furious.
Anyway, when you do that good deed, give that gift or share encouraging thoughts do it because you feel it. Don’t make gestures with the hope of getting something in return. It will always lead to avenues of failure. That ladies and gents is my gift to you!