There are so many things I wanted for myself by the time I hit 40. Many of those things I actually wanted by the time I hit 30, but as many say life got in the way. I'm confident that I can achieve some of the goals I've set forth for myself. I'm even confident that the dreams I envisioned for myself are still attainable. I can't lie though....wholeheartedly believing that they will happen is something I'm not 100% invested in.
I can run down the list yet again....but my blog can be a testament to my desires. At this point, It's about making it happen. Although, I just want to let it go and give up on myself there's something that just won't allow me to do that. Whether it's a testament to my resilience or a testament to my stubbornness I don't know. All that I do know is that my dreams are still at the forefront of my mind. I often find myself silently crying about them and dreaming on top of dreams about them. Allowing my mind to take me places far away in a span of a few minutes can be tough because when you shake your head and focus on the here and the now, the reality of what's staring at you becomes all to clear.
So, here I sit. At 2 months from 40 and I'm not even close to achieving the biggest dreams I always wanted. Do I give up and create new dreams? Do I let it go and succumb to the reality that I'm no spring chicken? Do I accept that I will never be a mom or a wife? Where do I go from here? If anyone has an answer...let me know because I'm a bit lost....